Richard, I just read on your Twitter account that you have enjoyed a, "Much needed post birthday smoothie..."...A bit revealing, no?
so I just asked a Chinese man and found out our tattoos actually mean vagina...
His mom just described him as a manipulative, deceitful bastard -- oddly I still want him
No way. Our relationship is based solely on texting and sex. A phone call would be too much at this point.
You said your legs stopped working and then pulled yourself around the floor with your hands.
That explains the wood chips stuck in my nipples.
Just found a uh poem I wrote on ambien. It says to "cry your seamen filled tears" and "I hope you take a dagger to your vagina" and at the end it says "sincerely, God". What.the.fuck do they put in that pill?
He told me "it wants a kiss" WHY HAS THIS HAPPENED WITH 2 DIFFERENT PEOPLE.
I think it's starting to become crucial that I find a companion for my vagina.
You're the common denominator of my blackouts.
Um. Did you take a picture of me with a giant dildo after we went bowling?
My "lord keep me from stabbing a bitch" prayer has gotten a lot of miles today
can we drink soon
I'm not sure who this is but I'm free tomorrow night
Who the abstract fuck do you think you are!?
he's like the highest ranking tongue wizard i know.
Turns out naked twister is less fun than it sounds. I can never look Lee in the eye again. But Aimee's boobs are glorious.
Randomize
