I just witnessed two drunk midgets fighting over a graham cracker. I can die happy now.
chatroulette drinking game turned into a foursome.
i just realized i dont have a sober facebook picture since 2007
It's nice to see a girl prepared for the walk of shame. She brought headphones
He just walked into my room in a robe with a cooking pot of cereal.
He said it. He actually said "yes it's in".
She hash-tagged my name. I think it's safe to say that she remembers our hookup.
I could run a drunk marathon in heels
He gave me the award for most entertaining blow job. That should count for something.
So glad the long weekend is over so I can bring this bender to a merciful end.
My neck is PURPLE. This is NOT a good day to be indoctrinated by the cardinal...
Shaving your balls drunk sounds like a good idea untill you do it
What happened last night? I'm too scared to get out of bed and see the destruction.
First of all, check to see if that naked guy is still alive. He didn't look to be breathing when I left
Actually new year, new me. I haven’t had sex yet so technically I’ve been a virgin all year.
I think it stinks she’s cheating on him. My vagina on the other hand is tingly thinking about a summer of sexual healing
Randomize
