I gave him a blowie and after he said he wanted to send a giftbasket to the girl we met through.
Performed a legit marriage between 2 drunk people at last call yesterday. Becoming ordained has already paid for itself.
so today in my theology class we brought up the proper way to have sex. so rough sex was said by the teacher...I said I know a girl that likes to be choked. sorry but everyone knew it was you
You were pretty committed to that cat costume. Between pukes, you would meow and assure people that you just had a hairball you couldn't get out...
at one point i was feeding a guy sour cream chips and he made me make the "choo choo" noise as they were going in. \ni feel so much closer to him now.\n
He never gives up. He's like the fucking little engine that could of hook ups
I'm not entirely sure what happened last night, but I think I dislocated my kneecap during an epic Mario Kart battle...
Just an FYI if we break up I'm going to sleep with your cousin or who ever my dealer is.
You know you come from good stock when you can have a family discussion about excuses to scam pain pills from the doctors
I can't turn off my feet"
Now that mom and dad sold the camper, do you think it's okay to talk about all the sex I had in it?
I get so many dick pics from him...He has an unhealthy obsession with his own penis...
I just want to slap everyone in the face that's happy being sober. Loser.
day drinking caused me to be in bed at a decent time. can't complain.
I broke another vibrator the other day. Abstinence is not for me.
Randomize
