I think I saw a glimmer of recognition, but she must not have been able to make me out through all of her whorishness.
Just bought purple Ray Bans. If there was any small chance that I would ever have sex with women ever again, I just buried it.
I am NOT getting arrested in a batman mask
theres gunna be a new season of 16 and pregnant on mtv...WHERE DO THEY KEEP FINDING THESE IGNORANT PREGNANT GIRLS
just got high and bedazzled my bra. other than bleeding from the prongs life is so good.
I say we get drunk before the exam tomorrow. At least then we have a valid excuse for failing.
Wait til she sees the pic of her vag in court docs.
I just put fruit snacks in my sangria instead of real fruit. Its like freshman year all over again..
We couldn't afford sangria freshman year. We're lucky we had fruit snacks..
Hey. I can't work your space dryer so I'm wearing your blanket home. I'll get my clothes later. Fun party!
What kind of life do I lead that no one is surprised by the fact that I was watching porn at work with the hot 37 year old?
That's right. I did.
You are the saddest 25 year old gay man I've ever had the displeasure of knowing.
He literally wrote out a schedule. On it, there's a taco break, and a spot where I start crying.
Just went to my first strip club and they had Fox News on. Conservative booty time.
I'm fucking sick of guys. I think I'm going to date myself. No drama. And I know I'll always put out.
Dipping my sugar cookies in a glass of fireball and creme soda. This is holiday spirit
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