I was just curling my hair topless and I just burned my nipple. Ouch.
I want to have your abortion
P.S. I can't hear my feet
ill do whatever it takes for me to get more high and eat pie
She had her underwear around her neck. No one can tell me i'm a slut now.
I'm naked and wearing a cowbell.i love med school.
It's official, the cities waste management does not recycle porn.
I think my hookup is starting to fall for me. Time to break his heart.
I drunkenly took 3 laxatives last night since I felt fat.... this is going to be a rough morning
Doing the walk of shame at 1 AM. Stumbled across a rave. This night is epic.
I just used crown royal bags as pot holders...
If you're signed up as "sober sister" can you do cocaine or nah
I was told today that I'm the ugliest bartender in the area, so, I guess I have that going for me.
Just learned that the cute guy I've been flirting with at the beach this whole time is actually an inmate working in the community instead of being in prison.. My life is unreal
So I got a text from him saying "jacking off...thinking of you" I think I'm going to get a restraining order
Randomize
