Worst sexual experience IN MY LIFE. And now i know why it makes jesus cry.
I just saw the preacher from the church I grew up in while I was buying condoms at the drugstore... he remembered me.
All I know is for some reason I was sitting naked in the hallway playing an invisible ukulele singing somewhere over the rainbow. I wonder why security came.
it was like getting a handjob from robocop
I just spewed blue gatorade in the shower. It looked like the ocean.
just wrote a 6 page paper on my blackberry. including 3 sources. college is teaching me good things so far.
i'm just sitting here watching hocus pocus, eating takeout, and taking self esteem quizzes online while everyone is out partying. you tell me how my night is.
Whatever. I'm just trying to get my dick sucked while taking online harmonica lessons
I'll have my hookups make my March Madness picks. Win my bracket, win my heart. That's how it works right?
His search history includes homemade sex toys and a plunger. I'm scared about what goes on in their place.
Please come over, I'm slowly melting into a ball of sexual frustration. If I'm not dead by the end of the day be very surprised.
We were coming but I found wine on my way out the door.
we were both freshly single and using each other as rebounds. most intense sex I've ever had. i felt like a grizzly bear emerging from hibernation in a whirlwind of sexual fury
party at the soccer house. crumbs in my sexy panties. can't. put. pieces. together.
Dude, she was there with her husband and I was there with my wife. Of course we banged in the bathroom.
Randomize
