Those 2 guys from the sonic commercial will be virgins for life.
I think you missed the wrong class. Im pretty sure we were taught how to buy cocaine.
He is going overseas for 8 months, not only was that blowjob a going away present, but i was supporting the troops
i have to get rid of the hedgehog.
Does it come with a cage?
yes. and food and toys.
i'll trade you an 8th for it
deal.
I'm sober enough to realize she looks like a man, but drunk enough to do it anyways
Went from beach to class to bar all while wearing my swimsuit as pants. Clearly I'm dressed for success.
Still can't decide which I'm more disappointed about: the blow job I gave him or the donuts I ate after.
I would come over if there was not the impending fear of me shitting out my brains.
I can't put those talents on a resume
1. so the new neighbor u called dibs on.. I'm sorry..but not really. 2. She lactates, I guess that happens when you have a kid less then 5 months ago.... WTF!! 3. Is it fucked up I'm craving Ceral & Milk now?
I'm going to need a penis the size of a bat
Will u make me a "6 month anniversary of being single" cake??? I wanna celebrate
I'm keeping both. The way I see it, boyfriends come and go, but a good dick is forever.
I'm not going to drink anymore, and on that note I'm not going to drink any less either, so I'll see you there. . .
If my body were a person, it would be beating the shit out of me for what I did to it last night.
Randomize
