You don't understand, Single Ladies is like the Don't Stop Believing of the gay community.
i was trying to find the best way to say come over and have sex, without saying it.
Apparently Sundays are the worst days for your friends to get their head split open and need stitches...there's only 1 doctor on duty
why didn't you tell me his penis tasted like oreos?
I haven't gotten it in awhile but since spring break is next week I'm willing to have a pregnancy scare if it means no bleeding through the suit
Yeah wouldn't want it to interfere with beach sex. Nothing should interfere with beach sex
HEAR YE, HEAR YE! BY ROYAL DECREE, I WILL BE KNOCKING ON YOUR DOOR AT 2PM UNLESS YOU GET THE FUCK UP. IT'S 1:50. CIGARETTE TIME, BITCH. I LOVE YOU.
I ate shit on a rock, and when I got up this car full of people asked me if I was okay, and I just sprinted away screaming "I am a banana!"
I yelled out look at all those hickeys. And then gave her boyfriend a high five
Would nail polish remover take gorilla glue off my nipples? We had a strange night.
Boss out of town. Had 2 beers for lunch, a long walk and a bowl...and then in he comes. Blamed obvious intoxication on my pain meds. Back at the bar. This is one of those bad judgement days.
Was your wine and cheese snap taken from the toilet?
Ted is on HBO in 20 minutes...not sure if this or the drunken dance party I had at the bar to a N*SYNC Christmas song 20 minutes ago is the highlight of my week so far.
I told him we could fuck whenever was concurrent for both of us
I want to get a list going called "D list celebs I've kissed"
I feel like I don't show you my boobs enough. And you deserve to see them like all the time
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