Just wanted to let you know that if you need my services as a male dancer for his birthday, let me kno so I can clear my schedule
It's not called being bisexual its called making out with anyone that has a mouth
I'm going to get so drunk tonight, I actually feel bad about the 30 seconds of drunken awkward sex I'm going to have with one lucky fat chick.
Just a heads up: The party is Fourth of July themed. Spread the word
dude its may
Work with me here, man.
I feel like I have streams of color and coldness wrapping around my body.
Using his name makes it all too personal. I refuse to get attached to this one. This is all about ass. He doesn't get a name.
Dude, didn't you know? Its balls out wednesday.
I got back at him the only way I knew how, by hooking up with the guy he hates from their rival fraternity.
I understand why they say don't drink the water in Mexico... I just saw 5 guys piss upstream of where the bar tender went to get the water
Please rescue me. but take your time, im getting pizza
It's a goat... but where the fuck did it come from?
I can't wait to get home and brush the fuck outta my teeth.
Literally.
It's settled. One of us is going to bang her brother. The world demands justice and he's hot. We'll be the justice league if it were made of alcoholic whores
That's why god made go-pro's and tequila
and idk now I have nine bags of lettuce in my fridge
Randomize
