I'm watching harry potter...good thing I already know I'm gay
I wish I had my old roomstes number so I could send him pictures from lastnight... I had a blast banging his "true love" now that I think about it we're even don't worry about that gas bill you didn't pay. Ur girl worked it off!
Please don't tell anyone I peed on your wall.
Im positive, your name was on my abdomen, Im pretty sure thats solid evidence
Never visiting again. You guys drink like immortals
When we do our power hour over Skype I'm just going to sit on the toilet so that way I won't have to get up in the middle of it and miss any shots
I have a test in the morning in sign language about signs for drugs and alcohol use. Im drunk and rolling a blunt. I've never felt so confident about a grade in my life.
This is a mass text. First one to reply gets head.
Before anyone claims this, this chick is in my boyfriend's phone as "Worst BJ EVER!"
Does that mean you're calling dibs or can I?
Attempting to sleep without a bra since i got my nips pierced wish me luck. Also almost sent that to my coworker.
The great part about clubs is that you can fart everywhere and nobody knows! The bad part is I'm on e and i have nobody to fondle.
FUCK and YOU. times 10. To infinity and beyond. You bastard. Worst. Cockblock. Ever. I'm going to nail your sister.
did you make it home?
i'm in a room and it looks like mine :)
hahah close nuff if it isnt
Somehow my boobs came up in conversation AGAIN last night and I'm still not getting laid...
QUIT BEING A BITCH, DRINK SOME PEPTO, AND PUKE ON OUR FOES
Why can't he see that I don't want a slow getting to know you period? I just want to bone. NOW.
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