Don't threaten to terrorize my ass hole unless you have to wherewithal to back it up
waiting in line for my ID. the kid in front of me reaks of hopes and dreams and hornyness-- freshmen by calvin klein
She made me cum so hard I couldn't hear for half an hour after
Biggest lesson I have learned in college: Drink if you are happy. Drink more if you aren't.
Had no idea what his name was when I woke up. Went through his desk, found his tax records. Ben. And loaded.
No, man, we stole the housekeeper's key and we're just going room to room raiding mini fridges. Hurry
Logan has the vodka and snickers. We're making a run for it. Room 302
Wonderful brian is stoned out of his mind, floating in a lawn chair in the hot tub eating a giant plate of macaroni and staring at the moon
Me and this random chick had a conversation about how to save the world. 2 words: Dance. Battles. I love drunk heart to hearts in bar bathrooms.
Some cougar Brit said she loved me. America is bouncing back.
Ran out of plates, so I'm using my sociology notes. Looks like they will finally have a practical use.
I never forget a pussy, even blackout me gives me that memory.
I was drunk and really grossed out when you poured cheese on me and, I guess I just freaked out.
For an hr, you were convinced you no longer had a right arm so you played Super Mario Bros with just your left hand vs Beth. You won btw, mite b why she refused to wear the unicorn head
Also send boobie pics with bobs burgers in background its the only way to get me off anymore
so we have roughly decided that hes the dude all the chicks will bang in college, just so he will do their term papers
Randomize
