Wow senior week shows you new things about yourself
Is this the I'm gay speech?
I just realized that my mother and I have the same favorite sex position, Guess which one!
OMG! Ew.
Lucky Dad.
I feel like Captain Hook just gave me a pap smear.
So I feel really bad about last night...can i give you a blow job and we call it even?
We discussed how the marijuana was making the dopamine float around our nucleus accumbens last night when we were high. Yet another example of how our science classes are perverting our good times.
dude i woke up to her making a statue of my morning wood for her sculpture class. HOW THE FUCK do you think i feel about her?
period poops. best. ever.
omigod im sitting here with ben and he and i both got that...chick you totally just mass texted that...
she insisted i was the anonymous guy on formspring that kept asking to bang her
Clearly I went along with it
You two were too busy to notice that his used condom landed on me when he threw it.. Thanks.
As pissed as she was, you would've thought I was trying to get back into his pants instead of his booze collection.
We peed together in a dark alley while holding hands. That is a bond that can never be broken.
you should never start the day with a boob text. It can only go downhill from there
It was an interesting experience to have sex while there was a triathlon going on right outside my bedroom window because it sounded like everyone is cheering for you in bed.
How supportive!
Bring shot glasses to the final. Don't ask questions.
You left your phone here
Wait...
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