Kelly, is this rhetorical, or sarcastic? You are very kind & quite beautiful, but we never really evolved into anything & your prevailing ambivalence spoke more than words ever could.
"We" really do not exist-if we ever did. Both of us may have been hoping for more than was possible.
I would enjoy sitting down to talk about the dissolution, but think it may end up being counter productive.
The dentist just called my mother to confirm the appointment that I made on his answering machine at 4:33 am this morning..
Bret has after-school detention for writing Brianna has a stinky vag on the ground at recess.
you mean i was at the winter classic?
They were so slutty we had to play "rarely have I ever."
Do I buy ice cream sandwiches or a 40? these are the difficult life decisions I am faced with.
Just an FYI: The offer for you to come snow blow my driveway in return for sexual favors is still on the table
It's a journey
And the destination is his penis?
Precisely.
Some old chick is rubbing my thigh and saying she needs some Memorial Day dick. Her teeth are kind of gross but I'm going for it.
I'm not sure... How do you tell someone who was so smashed they couldn't remember shoving their dick into the fireplace that their mother actually witnessed the whole thing?
The bartender has no bra and is giving out free shots. Call mom I'm getting married.
I mean obviously I like your dick... Jury is still out on you but your dick is good
Is it weird that I only look up my ex on Twitter when I take a shit? May have conditioned myself to associate him with shit
I just need you to appreciate that this is the first time I've ever been cut off and it's at an airport bar in Philly before 1 o'clock in the afternoon.
At first it will make you think "how is this physically possible?" and then it will ruin an entire food group for you.
Randomize
