I hope I'm pregnant just to spite you.
Let me guess--your parents are cousins.
you handled that situation with as much grace as someone puking involuntarily could
370HSSV 0773H read that upside down
what are you doing with your life
The bartender just hugged us goodnight. I think we go there too often.
It's called "lets see how many European capitals we can do the walk of shame through in one year"
She literally just changed his birthday. Overly attached girlfriend has nothing on her.
Why isn't there a super hero that comes to the aide of really high kids when they kill their car battery?
She pretty much spent NYE measuring dicks, trying to decide which one to take home.
On the shuttle bus from the Casino the driver refused to take us to the strip club so you said "let me off this bus or ill puke on you".
He went down on me for an hour and a half. He needs to get promoted more often.
Ok thats great. so just to recap: you fucked a billionare in his penthouse last night, and I had a glass of wine on the toilet.
I didn't know how to commemorate his death, so I snorted a fat line off of his obituary. Rest in peace.
I'm noticing I drink less and do fewer lines when I do both together.
Now that's what I call smart money management.
So, is Canada considered an excessive distance to go for a booty call? Asking for a friend...
Randomize
