Yup u can hook up with me now and not goto jail
Haven't eaten in 11 hrs. I am gonna have so much material to talk about with anorexic girls now
Seriously, I'm delusional. Idk how these models even walk on the runway
I gotta feeling the economic climate has killed the housewife market
it seems that i get a boner from just about everything now
So after THIS dui, I've decided to stop driving. Not drinking, just quit driving.
I tried to pay my bar tab with my gym membership card. Twice.
kicked my backpack and turned on my vibrator in the middle of class. success.
they found her hiding behind the couch trying to feed a cabbage patch doll a bottle of tequila. please tell me she's on birth control.
i never thought it was possible to fit gay, redneck and asian into the same sentence before i met you.
and this wasn't even the first one i'd hooked up with
he said i ruined lesbian porn for him
I swear, he has the body awareness of an acid-tripping quadriplegic.
I'm on my fifth cocktail in twenty minutes. I don't think I will end this on two legs.
Do you ever just feel like you can feel hormones radiating from your uterus?
Why was I lying under a truck last night?
got some info she was last seen with some guy wearing goggles
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