Are you with Adam and his vodka?
Yeswdsssss I masde his pickle gi away ans he go anbnoued
I don't care how bad it tastes, i just put it in my mouth and deal with it
I feel like if I were on Intervention, I would have to be a season finale.
I bought a zebra print bikini, I'm gonna be honest here- if he doesn't want to have sex with me in this, he's gay.
Preparing for thanksgiving at home now by chugging bourbon. Less than a month to train!
Sneezing blood is a good thing right? Medically speaking.
You broke the end off a wine bottle, ran outside and screamed "FOR NARNIA!!"
Last night you told me to stop being Martha Stewart and asked if I had Taco Bell in my house
Last thing I remember was a hand in the pants. Then I woke up next to a full beer and a McDouble, which I promptly had for breakfast.
I slept naked with a towel wrapped around my waist in case I pissed the bed again
I didn't want to leave, I wanted to move into his ass
THERES A FUCKBOY IN MY PERSONAL SPACE
GET IT AWAY FROM ME IM ALLERGIC
That was the best shit ever it was like an exorcism for my colon
Please don't give away my fajitas
If by whore you mean UPGRADE....then yes I am
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