Well if yoir are still awake and secided to drink... You may aswell drink
That text needs to switch to water.
When I woke up his cat was sleeping on my face and i had scratch marks on my neck. not happy.
only room for one pussy in that bed.
i'm the matthew mcconaghey of this party. i'm too old, and too high.
I couldn't sleep so I drunk ellipticaled for an hour. Worst. Idea. Ever.
You're like my zumba instructor for alcoholism right now
so the photographer said "let's get a picture of the cousins" so we posed together, and then he said " lets get a picture of the couples" So we posed together.
last night we stole an a/c window unit from a frat. gonna be a great summer
Just burnt my nuts with a cigarette. Don't ask. I hate life.
It's fun yes. But hard on the body. I woke up with her purse, socks and one of her shoes in my room. The other shoe was outside. What the fuck were we doing last night?
painting my nails while super high-drunk. Ended up painting my entire hands. Both.
Get his dick out of your ass and put on some pants we're here
So we were in bed when his brother walks in, walks over to me, fist bumps me and says he just wanted to say hi, then leaves...so random lmao
I'm sure there are thousands getting dick today in the name of independence
We didn't mean to put a petting zoo in the elevator.
my boobs just made me lose a game of beer pong. the balls hit them, bounced off and into the cup. twice. ive never been so disappointed in them.
Randomize
