Ha i know. My vag can't go too crazy for a boy halfway across the country. It doesn't have that good of range
farters have to be the big spoon...
You know, be my cock's hype man.
I'd really appreciate it if we could dress up as pilgrims and indians for the thanksgiving eve bar crawl
There are lots of gay asians. This is better than i was expecting
the lady next to me just sniffed my hair, smiled, and then fell asleep. I almost started crying from that kind of creepiness
don't cry, we can learn from her
I'm the saddest girl in a tutu right now.
Leaving your birthday party to engage in a threesome IS allowed. I checked the rule book.
I had fun watching you interact with the world around you. Like a fuckin 8 year old kid who just discovered build a bear but really wants a cigarette.
So I put a beer on your bed and jumped on th3 other side of the bed like in the commercials. You my good sir, owe me a budweiser that your bed drank.
I caught a glimpse of his penis. I can only imagine what your mom's vagina goes through because of that penis
So apparently I twerked on my coworkers last night. One month at the new job n I guess this is how I'm getting to know people
So that guy from plenty of fish has a lightning bolt tattooed on his face. I kinda feel like I HAVE to sleep with him now.
OK... But I need to shower first because I'm covered in stuff I definitely shouldn't have slept in
Stop recording sex noises and setting them as my ringtones. This time it was at a funeral
Randomize
