How far into the semester do we have to be before it's ok to get drunk in between classes again?
I have way too much money in my bra to be responsible.
I think I breastfed the cat at some point during the night, at least that's what my nipples are saying
Shaving your vagina at 8 months pregnant is not an easy chore.
I remember seeing LSAT prep books and thinking "Whose room is this? I should be hooking up with them instead."
And have you ever tried to explain a hickey to your own grandmother?
You didn't hold all these dicks to become a party planner!
I should not be so motivated by a penis, but I am
I was like, booze is the closest thing I have to a father. Don't pour daddy down the sink
Well, at some point in her life every girl has to decide how much weird she's willing to tolerate for hot tall banker cock
I can't open my mouth wide enough to make full use of this snapchate update
He just made this face while he was fucking me and he looked like the hunchback of Notre Dame, I had to stop him.
have fuck
*fun
actually forget it have a fuck too it'll do you good
Seriously if we go to rome ur fucking me into the sunset on a wrought iron balcony overlooking Vatican City
I'm wearing jeans from 7th grade and drinking a fucking macchiato. This better be a good day.
Randomize
