Why must guys tell girls who are a little bigger that "they like a girl with meat on her bones?" Yeah needless to say he went home alone
this just has baby written all over it
i just lost my virginity over my 3 hour lunch break..
u hav a 3 hour lunch break?!
i like how the length of my lunch break is the thing that phases u
You're like the curious george of whores
He literally had a note from his doctor saying he wasn't allowed to finger me for a week
There were so few words spoken that I'm not sure if it was make-up or break-up sex.
Your brother came in a girls mouth for the first time last night... Ah the tales told whilst buying minors beer.
oh sorry. I thought "boat" was code for "penis"
Oh god. Just tried to hail a pizza delivery car. Awkward.
International sake day = success
I won the booty shaking contest by mooning the whole bar
Got it in all night, now at a bar at 730 am and we are the only two people here. Somewhere my mid twenties father is applauding me.
Well anyways I still cant believe I don't remember such a monumental day in history as you showing me your boobs... Jesus
I'm glad you still love me even when I change pants in the kitchen and demand you spoon me
I just threw up on the way to class. Legit, on the sidewalk by psych building.
THAT WAS YOU? Psych prof just pointed out the window and said "that kids, is why you don't pregame before class"
It was like Lady and the Tramp, but just tramp and the tramp. And instead of spaghetti and meatballs, we had whiskey and cups
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