O no, u 2 are dating again?
No. I just masturbate furiously to his picture
Is it wrong to scream your own name when about to bust?
Chipotle...archenemy of the gay man. Cockblocking me since 1997
Reason #57 I am going to fail the bar... it's Tuesday and i'm drunk at Toy Story 3.
My third nipple is alarmingly under-appreciated.
I just peed behind the dumpster and dedicated it to you. Can i call u?
I woke up because a stranger was shoving an already lit bowl into my mouth. Spring break is awesome
You know he really cares when he gives you one of those on-the-go toothbrushes for your walk of shame before running to work
It's all fun and games until some random starts jerking it on the deck.
Apparently coming home smelling like I took a bath in beer is frowned upon in this household. I'm so glad I don't actually live here.
I think I just cured my dogs munchies
Your father is wrapped in a table cloth singing, "America Fuck Yeah!" You are missing the time of your life.
Apparently my thong was thrown in the cornfield last night. No one will tell me why.
Saw a thong on the yellow lines of the street when I left this morning, are they yours by any chance?
Well I only snuggle him I don't hump him. That's rude.
Randomize