im shaking like a drug addict and i almost just shat my pants when i sneezed...no more patron for me
we had you propped up in a chair and fed you donuts. i've never seen you happier
Judging by his buldge, this guy is huge. just paid steve to follow him into the bathroom and find out. They had a convo about it.
I had this image of some guy in a taco truck down by the IMA accosting you for a peep show.
For public speaking we have to bring an object that describes us to class. Can't decide if I wanna bring a flask or a shot glass.
Not sure if it's my shorts, hat, shoes, hair or soul but one of the above just got me drunk again from the glorious aroma of Keystone Light.
I went back to the party but by then they were all sitting on the floor in the dark listening to we are the champions on full blast.
It isn't possible and the very mindfuck of that concept gives me a lady boner.
We don't have the same problems as normal people do we?
You're like a human soul vacuum cleaner.
I apologize for using the phrase "monster cock hentai porn shit" to describe that guy I picked up last week.
Nothing says Happy Thanksgiving like picking cocaine boogers out of your nose at your parents house.
Must be why he thought choking was foreplay. Like WTF? No.
So my balls are accidently making an appearance on snapchat
it was a 'fall asleep on the bathroom floor after puking bc the cold tile is legit more comfortable than your bed' kind of night.
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