After 10 years all I have gotten is one bra pic, at this point I should be able to draw your cervix from memory
ISS teacher has a tramp stamp.
Shotgun.
I just used my thong as a hair tie. I think I reached my limit.
The gyno asked how many partners i've had... I said ummmm she goes ok then i'll just put down ten.
we fucked while standing on a ladder. challenging, but worth it.
I feel like that needs to be the last time i end a text with "fuck them i love tequila".
When he wears his hair down and sandals, he looks like Jesus. A Jesus I would fuck.
That's not what Jesus is for
Who are you to come into MY house and tell me when I can or cannot take my pants off?
My left boob kept making random appearances last night.
He said he was a banker. Then he told me he made 15 an hour. I said he was a shitty banker then fucked his friend.
You have the most beautiful penis I've ever seen. I never thought penises were meant to be beautiful, but you proved me wrong
she went outside...danced, got some snow, and put cherry vodka in it. she was so proud of herself.
You texted me a picture of some random naked guy. Did you lose your virginity?
i was sitting on the kitchen floor shaking my gallon of vodka at people and asking if they wanted to climb the heaven hill... getting dumped is the best thing that has ever happend to me
Omg I'm having dinner at chilli's with a guy who is arguing that getting a weed leaf tatoo on his neck will prevent him from getting a job as a dental assistant
Well that actually sounds reasonable
Randomize
