I wake up every morning and wish that I didn't have to wear a bra
Robbie told me you spent 10 mins discussing the curl in his hair and that you said "with that curl in your hair, you'll go far"
Saddest moment ever is discovering when your cat no longer wants to get high with you.
I have no idea what's going on.... I just want to wear my horse sweatshirt and drink vodka.
see these eyes, they just want to bone and go to sleep.
And after we were done he said "Let's play a game! Who can find their clothes first"
Pretty sure I humiliated the fuck out of myself last night after I was dared to attempt to give myself head. I hate vodka
pretty sure tht was the guy who once went to the club dressed as waldo. he still looks weirdly fuckable.
I think its awesome that i just got you to cheer for sex
Well sex is awesome. Sex deserves cheers.
barely 48 hours and I've done the dirty on both of my roommates beds before they've even slept in them
he said we should drink responsibly and we all just kinda sat there laughing at him
You're either getting fucked or a coupon to Friendly's. I haven't decided yet.
He licked the buffalo sauce off my fingers and then we had the best sex of my life.
you said, "the pool was totally tequila. and i left my shoe halfway across town. and by shoe i mean car" it appeared to me that you didn't have your shoes or car.
How much have you had to drink?
Qhaghao Oslo?
That seems like quite a lot.
Randomize
