I'm sorry for the crack den comment. You have a lovely apartment.
yup put them legs up on your shoulders and eat her like some folgers
eat her like coffee?
Apparently oprah and I were in competition to see who's ass could get bigger this summer
I'm sitting in the drive through at Mcdonalds right now watching the workers pressure wash the vomit I left from last night.
I have realized now that neither the top nor bottom of a bunk bed is safe for sex....
i was that girl throwing up in the urinal. it was a dark moment in my life.
just found out I caught the bouquet at the wedding. I win for being the drunkest yet most functional bridesmaid.
WHAT DID YOU SAW VERBATIM. VERBATIM IS SOBER FOR WORD FOR WORD
I think a kid would responsible me up
I just told the sun to stop. That hungover.
I just heard your voicemail. Glad you like my dick and think I'm cool
I was wondering why are people staring at me til I realized I was bra-less with a lei around my neck
he was spending his time trying to use emojis to court a 19 year old, I can’t really take that seriously no matter how hot a dude is
Why can I remember how tall Nicki Minaj is from looking up her height once months ago, yet after weeks into the semester I can't even remember where any my classrooms are located
Importance
I'll text you when I have a mental breakdown about it.
Please do.
Randomize
