I just want you to know that me val and amanda are drinking on top of a hill lookig at the chicago skyline drinking icehouse and we just peed in public.
Stalkers don't have time for showers...it's a full time job
Scott woke me up by cracking a beer open in my face. Best friends are awesome.
Just passed a Taco Bell Taco Supreme, still in its wrapper, laying in the grass. I'd like a moment of silence.
May it rest in peace.
if he only knew that in between each sext i was puking.
Housing came buy and confiscated our shopping cart :(
Just put my hand under my pillow and found a peach ring. Lat night just came rushing back.
I got mine. It's a truly beautiful penis. Plus he pulled his tongue muscle on my vagina.
Overdraft my account again. Parents are starting to ask questions. What would go over better a gambling or drug addiction??
Today, my boyfriend informed me that I look like my dad when I orgasm
Either your boy toy or the kid who pulled a knife on me in high school is here
Also, I found out that my dad has the name of every boy that I've ever dated and their physical description, car type and tag number stored in his computer.
Apparently Angela went missing once and he says he learned were to look first and that it's best to have information on hand.
why does drunk me think that doing things like throwing up on my desk and all over my 15 page lab report is okay
When you're all settled in, text me, and I can sorta apologize for saying that your phone can suck my dick. What I really meant to say is that your Windows phone can suck my Android phone's dick.
Why the fuck was I face down on the floor with you mounting me like a horse anyway? I'm so confused
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