whats a polygalesbian?
lesbian polygamists..duh.
but i am gonna have to have sex w/ him again to get my earrings back
i'm pregaming while finishing a paper on cardio myocyte contractility in mice. i'm kicking finals week's ass right now
I don't know what's happening. Everyone is wearing beaks.
Were playing beruit winners pelt losers with eggs
ps if your frozen peas taste like crotch it's because some dude kicked me in the nuts while trying to do a keg stand and I needed an ice pack
Not sure if he was actually hot or hot in a "he brought a live chicken to the party" kinda way but I got his # regardless
The "don't get cum on anything" rule also applies to my furniture and scarves
That's not technology. Doesn't count.
Except there is my pee all over the walls now
Just so were clear I meant the head your face is on
He should be castrated
Nah he might accidentally come while they're cutting it off. Wouldn't be fair to the surgeons
I want the address of the individual responsible for strawbeeritas. I want to send them gift basket.
I am listening to my ipod while i puke, this is most entertaining hangover i have ever had.
We left an ass print on the conference room table, but I don’t think anyone caught on
I just caught your son trying to perform fellatio on himself. What do I do?
Randomize
