Hotel room at 3 am. She's 42. Stockings and heels. All because I opened with a joke about cougar hunting. We'll high-five later.
I wasn't excited about it either, but if I was going to have her take a load on her face, role playing as some french dude is the least I could do
i thought they made a 7-hour walmart run, but they were actually in jail.
they were having a wine tasting so i tasted every wine...then knocked over an entire display of gourmet olives and was asked to leave... but they still let me buy my 6 bottles of wine before escorting me out
I'm genuinely dissapointed that we didn't make any fat chicks cry
Yeah, I probably scared him away when I drunkenly told him we'd have beautiful children
sorry bout that man. went out to pay the pizza boy, ended up hooking up with some random drunk girl that thought i was someone else
You burned the hair off your arms. Again.
It grows back stronger each time.
I just spent an hour in the shower pretending I was a member of the b-52's. I can't go to work like this
Sex on acid. Try it. I thought we were fucking in outer space with fireworks inside a rocketship car. Best.
Naked. naked and bneed help.
Sangria Flip Cup was probably one of our worse drunken decisions
On the way home she told me she was in kindergarten when 9/11 happened
He's not put together enough to have that big of a dick
There's a big ass bed, hella ecstasy, and I can guarantee you'll regret every second that you remember.
Randomize
