so then she threw up in his asshole
yep..that'll do it.
I was totally willing to let her keep giving me blowjobs as long as she didn't think we were in a relationship.
good. and stop kissing my girl you dirty slut.
i don't think she's still your girl..plus, she kept screaming "kiss me! i'm a lesbian!" last night so i think you're outta luck..
Do fat girls normaly have fat that look like a penis by their pussy?
What the hell did you do last night?!
I'm telling people I'm celibate. It sounds cooler when it's by choice.
stayed up to watch the sunrise..saw an albino taking shots on the quad..it's like there's a whole new world of people out there just waiting to meet us
I thought it was kinda weird that her ten yearold sister was playing bartender, but hey, the girl makes a damn good drink
he obviously didn't care that i was sleeping and dreaming about ellen degeneres knitting me a christmas sweater.
First coke bust down the road. Spring is finally here.
Dude that girl I hooked up with Tuesday is in lecture. I told her I was from the Dominican visiting my cousin and was leaving the next day. Hiding under my hood and hangover.
They never prepare you for how broke ur gonna be in college. I just accepted money from two underage girls at a gas station to buy them beer only because I'm trying to figure out a way to run off with it without them noticing.
Dude, use it to buy them beer. Then run the beer to ur car as fast as you can and bring it to the party. Seriously, we're running out of booze over here
he apologises profusely for spelling mistakes in his texts but doesn't care about cheating on me. priorities
The little girl I'm babysitting is having a tea party, the water and chips she's passing out are doing wonders for my hangover.
My vagina is officially offended.
Dude I think the cat just licked the coke plate
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