I'm gonna have a badass scar
Are you seriously drinking already? It's 11AM. Still morning.
I'm going by McDonald's time. And since they stop serving breakfast at 10:30 and start serving lunch, it is now afternoon.
No idea how i never noticed that penis before. I wonder if it works
Why would you say my penis is small in front of so many people?
he just used "boss" and "boner" in the same sentence. I cant respond.
I took his sheets with my when I left seeing that I underestimated my period. Also grabbed a 6-pack out of the fridge because breakfast is the most important meal of the day & I don't do other peoples laundry for free.
she made sit in a corner, drink nothing but water and told me she was worried about me because i picked up an irish guy at a taxi rank. says the girl who invented tequila night and fucked a guy in a park across the street from a sweet sixteenth.
drunk caitlyn doesn't know how to work gmail. so know an email has been sent to the entire campus with a picture of me naked eating a bagel attached.
Right now he's sitting in the chair pointing to me to go away. He's trying to have quiet time with his penis.
Sadly he is straight as an arrow that is designed by a robot computer from the future with lasers.
This saddens me. Mostly because I want to see the schematics on that robot.
Spent the majority of my senior year drunk. Graduate of 2011, I think 2011. Probably.
Some girl woke me up at 1:30 am looking for weed and the next thing I know I'm in a hot tub with 3 girls, 2 40's, and a blunt.
Also I know now I was meant to be a comedian. Had both arresting officers laughing.
I lost my wolf penis dildo in my garage. I should probably find it before I resume my garage sale tomorrow...
Why is everyone giving me a hard time for drinking?!
Your in the library.
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