You would DIE at the bar we're at right now. All indian/asian med students, I swear
Asian doctor ratio. So hot. I would've gone into heat
Omg. Budweiser tramp-stamp sighting @ Wal-mart. Best tattoo EVAR.
i just told my mom tuesday boozeday rhymes so that she can remember not to text or call me on wednesday mornings
youre going to kill that woman one of these days
I feel like you pissing on my ping pong table isn't something to be proud of.
He was going down on me as I discovered a spaghetti-O on my boob. Its been a while since I faked it.
On the 3rd day, she mixed sangria and orange juice and saw that it was good.
Because drinking and showering don't go hand in hand. There that's my PSA of the day.
No. Every time we go there, you end up getting high, then lost, then going home with strangers.
I expect you will be there for a drunken 3way with my husband again this new year.
that awkward moment when you use blowjob jokes as a segue into coming out as bi
It's becoming clear to me that I am not sugar baby material. I don't think I could handle old balls long term.
This whole Rob and Chyna drama is giving me trust issues. I'm about to text my ex and be like if you haven't already deleted my nudes, can you?
He's petting your head, we need to leave now.
We were having sex and he started doing some weird swivel move. I was like wtf and he said sorry just trying to pop my knee.
How was it?
Incredible. Everyone in the world should be having the kind of sex I've been having.
He should write a pamphlet or something...
Randomize
