I would do horrible things to your vagina.
Prove it.
Just tried calling my phone on my phone because i thought i lost my phone.
Its the Friday before break. There are 20 kids in my 300 person lecture hall. All with the same what the fuck am I doing here look on there face.
the extent of background information i have on her is minimal, but it will get me in her pants
As I was puking last night I told them "it's ok I'm a paramedic"
Ssssssssssshhhhhhhhhhhiiiiiiii!iiiiiiiiiitttttttttttttttssssssssssssshhhhhhhhooooooooowwwwwww. Letters for emphaSSIIISISEEEE!
Holy fuck, spaghetti burritos are the best idea I've ever had.
He's claiming he can open a beer bottle with anything. He's been trying for a while now with a power rangers action figure and he is just cutting the hell out of his hand. There is blood all over billy
My gynecologist got a full view of the obviously bite marked shaped bruises on my thighs. I just kept talking about work and hoped she wouldn't judge me.
WHAT GOOD IS APPRECIATING IF NOBODY'S NAKED
One public bathroom does not equal a wedding vow
are you fucking roseanne barr in there?
Hi, I put a dog in your house, I hope it's yours.
It's going to turn into you and me throwing down in a devastating lip-synch battle while everyone else stands around awkwardly.
he went down on me and a few minutes later he asked to show me a magic trick. then he pulled a quarter out of my vagina
Randomize
