we had that weird still in bed morning after conversation. Her dad is the vp of my company.
i was the DD for the swedish students tonight. Got paid 23 dollars for driving 10 miles. gotta love ignorance and the confusion conversion brings.
Dignity is for republicans.
Yea. I think between making the bride puke, feeling up the maid of honor, and sleeping with a bridesmaid. I did my part.
Just so you know I would totally fuck you. Does that count as a feeling?
4pm update. Theres smashed cake inside my duffel bag, a vodka bottle in the dish drainer, and the most productive thing ive done is make 40 pigs in a blanket
how bad is she
captain morgan with tits
you are going to have to live with the consequences, i'm going to fuck your sister
the bandages come off on Tuesday. we can try out my new breasts then.
He found his first fuckbuddy I'm so proud I feel like making him a card or something
I feel like your personal Bdsm barbie...
Dude this weed has me so paranoid.
Yeah tell me about it I just screamed after I coughed because my own cough scared me.
Also you think METH is on the same level of wanting to see the movie cats? We’re gonna unpack that later
I think I recall josh coming in to the room to tuck us in and give us a few condoms and I threw them back all furious and told him 'we don't use those.' Oh god
He thought it would be sexy if he found my clothes and dressed me, and it was..until he found a thong under his bed and assumed it was mine. It wasn't
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