I think we should see other people.
Already working on it.
i want to have as much fun as i did last weekend. but plus the condom and minus the fear.
unlike you, ive never imagined darth vader masturbating
i just won "most creative" category in the condom contest in human sexuality by licking it onto a cucumber. my feedback forms included three phone numbers, one with a Magnum XL taped to it
Lesson of the night- sweaty dick can get stuck to ice, and require medical attention.
he told me i smelled like babies and pine needles and he wanted to bathe with me. new boyfriend is not a keeper
I'd rather be castrated by angry chipmunks Than live your life for 24 hours
Wait, whatever happened to locking our vaginas in closets?
you're the third guy in less than 24 hours she fucked. I'm glad you lost your virginity just don't act like you climbed Mt. Everest.
He sent me a 2am email the just said "Ping". Nerdiest booty call ever.
He stopped me mid blowjob and asked me to take off my hat. He said it made him feel like Neil Young was going down on him.
Drug test isn't today. Now I'm just sitting in this orientation with a bag of your piss in my pants
I just saw your brother in some random persons yard climbing a tree. Just saying.
Probably on drugs.
Did I fall last night?
I wouldn't call it falling as much as you tried to lay on the sidewalk and proceeded to hit it face first.
We're getting a bucket of chicken and screwing around, so no, you can't join us.
Randomize
