do you think there was ever a doctor who smelled his finger after giving a prostate exam?
you said the mailboxes were turning into babies and they started crawling away. then you cried and asked me how you were gonna get your college acceptance letters
Its so akward after he cums on my face. like usually the porn just ends
Had a dream I was a monkey and smoked pot out of a bong made out of a tree
You both must have been completely wasted because every once in a while we would hear you both stop and start singing to each other. At one point it was taylor swift.
My rats are drinking wine. I am drinking with rats. God i am so alone.
Let's just say after this weekend I'm known as Shameous the Irish bar fighter.
He told me I was 100% better then porn then passed out nto the cake
He pulled the pencil out of my leg and then we fucked. It felt sorta like pulp fiction in reverse.
I just had a flashback to the three of us in the bed and me shouting AM I THE BIGGEST OR LITTLEST SPOON?!
Somehow I've got the party rigged to where I get a foot massage every time someone wants a beer out of the fridge. Hellz yeah
sometimes when you're high at work you just have to say fuck it and eat the dog treats
smoked four grams out of a bong with a mixture of pool water and white rum. I applaud you for leaving before losing too many brain cells.
That was the first time I ever heard of a female getting road head while driving... thanks for the memory and making me happy ending..
I'd call the fact I ended up in my own bed a huge success
Randomize