Like worst hickies ever he always gives them like wtf
My boobs are too big for things to be going this downhill in my life.
Just had sex in the basement of the library... I knew I was paying $120,000 for something more than a law degree
this isnt the first time ive seen her dressed as abe lincoln
There's a paramedic out here, what have you done?
I am planning my day around naps and lesbians.
The first clue should've been that he literally had shit in his hair. How does that even happen?
Things I can say. There is a photo of me pouring whipped cream into a midgets mouth.
ETSY JUST SENT ME AN EMAIL WITH THE SUBJECT "SUMER ROMANCE" I'M BEYOND FUCKING DONE
Your drunk naked friend is roaming the living room. Started roaming my room. Please come retrieve him
My mute roommate is using sign language to ask a guy to fuck her.
I shit myself when I came, don't have flu sex
Are you in a good mood because I stuffed you with enchiladas, ice cream, penis, and cuddles last night?
is buying liquor on my lunch break too aggressive?
slept with a 6'5 mountain man from Montana and then he played 'Girls Just Wanna Have Fun' on repeat..
Randomize
