THEY JUST PLAYED KISS FROM A ROSE TONIGHT IS PERFECT
KATE. I JUST NOTICED THAT LOWERCASE D'S LOOK LIKE SLIPPERS.
Yeah well I just ate cereal out of a muffin pan with a fork. I'll flip a coin as to who has to tackle that pile of dishes we've neglected for 3 weeks.
time to smoke my breakfast
I told him to go down on me and when he did he started crying!! I asked him why and he said my vag looked just like his ex girlfriends!!!
Dude we got so high last night. I said "watch this" threw a goldfish cracker in the toilet, and laughed my ass off. We watched the dvd menu for 30 minutes too.
I just wiped my face with a slice of bread. Lowest point of the night.
So getting a bj to I believe I can fly is one of the greatest things ever
Her mom offered to give me a lap dance. I was a guest, I couldn't say no.
Im drinking ciroc out of an ice cream cone... my night is going fantastic
Brought some lesbians back to the light side of the force
We were going to play manhunt in a strip club, calling it mancunt.
The laundromat is nothing like In the pornos
Can you repeat that, but with context?
I just found a samari sword in the couch. I'm about to take like 5 shots and pretend to be captain jack sparrow
Randomize
