i hate sounding clingy, but i just wanted to verify i wasn't an asshole in your mind
Took her home last night and it was like trying to put an oyster in a slot machine. I may have drank a little too much.
i googled "the goonies drinking game." i may be alone, but i'm living the college dream.
We were making out in the bushes when some dude comes and starts peeing beside us.
He was telling me how the song fireflies makes him feel like he can talk to animals
i was trying to wake him up so i just kept touching his dick
Everyone threw up but him. I took off my shirt because I puked on it. There were also a lot of drag queens involved.
You made out with a guy who refers to his cock as "rafiki." Are you proud of yourself?
Is there a reason there's a dick print on my seventh-story window?
i came so hard i kicked through my windshield
He gave me my financial savings if I invested with him while I was giving him a bj.
Happy hour crawl turned into power happy hour turned into tequila shots turned into I'm drunk in class on Cinco de Mayo at 7 am.
I need more than 2 fuckable people this is an outrage
he was wearing a widestriped red gingham suit jacket with complete sincerity im not surprised she beat the shit out of him
Dude. So. Much. Sex. Find a girl in her 30s. Now.
Randomize
