i found the vodka. it was hiding in the orange juice.
This is no lauging matter. Huge cock equals great sex. Marriage to huge cock equals great life.
so far we have 6 big wheels and 10 boxes of wine for the tour de franzia. team drunkslut is favored to win the yellow jersey.
He told me he was in a Proactive commercial. It didn't seem to work for him but he was buying me shots so I slept with him anyways.
doing shots of $6 a bottle whiskey and chasing it with milk. my own personal way of saying fuck life.
At one point last night I over heard you say " I'm gonna puke in a bag and pour it down your throat" I LOVE YOU.
You have plans tonight?
Stress crying into a bottle of long island ice tea mix...other than that nope
I smell like icyhot and vodka... Heres to my pulled tendon.
I work nights. I sleep in. I take online classes. And fuck bad bitches. I'd say those are some perks to grad school.
Just wanted to say, I appreciate your bravery in having read receipts
WHO ARE THESE GUYS WHY AN ORGRY ON A MONDAY LMAO
I wanna hang out. The cats don't talk back.
So I'm at early voting and the group of ladies behind me is talking about voting no on 2 and my gummy is kicking in, thank lawd
My hands smell like vagina and ham.
I'm just really glad SD weather is so erratic so I can get away with wearing a scarf in May to cover up these hickeys.
Randomize
