I'm not a mortal combat character
but my vagina is
Im watching hello kitty on qvc debating if its a good idea to cook bagel bites on my space heater
the line runs infront of fredricks of hollywood. it's like gamestop is showing me how pathetic I am.
I was more traumatized by the table collapsing while i was going down on you.
his blanket is still in the back seat of my car, its like a constant reminder of his small penis
Annabeth just got on the bar and slurred something about how she was worried that when she started dating you your penis wouldnt fit. You are one lucky bastard my friend.
So this is what you do on your hungover days off put your balls into an egg carton?
Ive never seen one person more proud of themselves of peeing in public and getting away with it.
My roomate has me out looking for easter kegs hidden arround town
I would have cried, probably tears of wine, but cried nonetheless.
I actually had to apologize for "being too aggressive about harry potter"
Well that was the first and last time I've had to write "divorce party" on a request time off form. I'm throwing it for my mom. What is my life turning into.
I explained to him that me turning straight is a once a year thing. And this boy just happens to be the chosen one.
She's got a shotglass necklace, running down the street asking people to "fill her up". Get here.
Divorce can be hard, but look on the bright side. Your soon to be ex raved about your dick and I’m great with hard things ;-)
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