girl has like over 50 stars tattooed on her front, side and back. feels like i just fucked the universe.
he squeezed my boobs like he didn't know what else to do with them, then turned down head...
told you he was gay.
and thats when we got a drunken mammogram in the middle of cvs pharmacy
Just think about how many life skills I lack. Cooking... Driving... Sobriety...
As long as there aren't any pictures of me humping the penguin, we are good,
We are not buying weed off a guy from the internet.
It's such a good feeling to send those "I'm not in jail" texts on Sunday morning
I've decided I'm peeing in a solo cup then throwing it on his windshield. It's official. He called the cops 4 times in our first week at the house. He deserves it, right?
There is a visibable outline from you in the grass. its you in the fetal position...
I let him fuck me in a batman costume. Don't talk to me about needing to read fifty shades gray.
She said "I've been waiting to suck your cock since high school." I'm so glad so many freshmen are from our school.
You were fine, but your knee injury definitely came from interpretive dancing like a gay fairy with lead wings all around the Mission St BART. Everyone thought you were on drugs.
I'm playing a lilo and stitch drinking game
Aloha alcoholism.
all i know is there's a picture on my phone of him wearing my purple sweatpants and licking the bottom of my foot.
Some days, I wish I could get a hug from a furry muppet
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