I'm pounding a vodka drink as we speak to make her interesting
cab driver gave us mini bottles of jd for the ride home & proceeded to run every red light. wonder how many bottles he drank.
I had a dream last night where you were a transsexual in a low cut blue dress with lovely long brown hair. You were very pretty. I hope you are well.
i just realized that fran drescher is the 90's version of a guidette.
i knew she was high when she broke up the cookies into her glass of milk and ate it like cereal
I just watched nsync videos for the past half hour and you could totally tell lance bass was gay in all of them
I don't even see the point of going over to his place dressed anymore.
I hope you fall on your chin.
Jealousy makes you ugly.
i ran into my coworkers when i was walking home last night. i was shirtless. i think i gave my shirt to Walter. he's a cat.
im still drunk. birthday week begins.
He went 'unicorn hunting' and lost a fight with a fence. That's how he ended up in the ER.
Apparently after I threw up I put my socks in the toilet......
i know i saw many looks of jealousy when i walked solo into subway carrying a cheesy gordida crunch after taco bell closing hours
I'm sure for most of the people, it was the one and only miracle they will see
I just explained my sex life to the "if you give a moose a muffin" book... Is that weird?
I'd just like to inform you. That when I was at bvj the first day I was blackout drunk by noon. Get on past Chelsea's level like now. Do it for present Chelsea
It's only awkward the first ten minutes you realize it's not your house.
Woke up went to work ate beef after three year hiatus shat my pants went to bed
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