they say Disney World is the happiest place on Earth. It's a close second to the Super 8 on route 18. That place holds some great memories.
hell yes lets make some ravioli
Idk. We dropped acid and Kevin ran away again. We didn't find him for like 3 hours.
Man I wish I had been there
Yah we found him in the pool shed of some elderly couple. They were on the porch watching all of the shenanigans. ...To be young again.
Tell me why Im cashing out of Walmart with Smirnoff and catfood
boyfriend # 1 is in the bathroom and boyfriend # 2 is ringing the doorbell need back up this is not a drill i repeat this is not a drill
toilet paper cling ons are not as adorable as the little red cub makes them look on the charmin commercials.
I wish the inside of the tampon box said "CONGRATULATIONS YOUR NOT A MOTHER!"
let's just pour the lemonade mix into the soco. cut out the middle man.
I mean it's my life so what if i want to drink Molson from my sparkly shoes and not regret anything
next time we drink: battle shots.
battle shots or battle shits? if its the first, explain. if its the second I think I figured it out.
So for future reference.... it's a little unnerving when I can't get hold of you, and the last communication we had was, "Oh fuck... It's tequila"
Mom just referred to a 9 year old as "this bitch", so I'd say day drinking was a success.
5 hours of volunteer work playing with puppies and banned from the frat I hate most as 'punishment'... Besides the ER trip, I'm not seeing the bad in this situation
When I get off work and you're not around to hang out with all I do is lay around in my underwear and eat potatoes.
Definitely went to court without a bra and panties because Mr. LastNight’s dog stole them. I guarantee you I was the only lawyer going commando in court
Randomize