Porn is love you can see.
operation "beaches make me wet" is a go
I just want you to know the floor between our rooms isnt sound proof "Captain Cock"
And he tried to make it as casual as possible by asking where i was going on vacation while he was poundin me.
He compared my vagina to the first time he tried cocaine
Got free coffee because I told the guy at starbucks the pleats in his khaki pants made his cock look big.
I remember three things: you falling down an entire flight of stairs, me stripping out of your Christmas one-sie to do cartwheels in my underwear, and people standing above me saying, "where did that bump on her head come from?"
Also, I was told I kept the antlers on the entire time. I'm deeming last night a success.
Don't be alarmed at the kitchen mess. I had to shoot the fire extinguisher on the toaster oven, one quick blast. It was a matter of safe over sorry.
Is it acceptable to cry on a Friday or am I supposed to drink to forget it?
Dude at one point I lost you only to find you sitting in the bushes eating pizza.
oh my god you are days, if not hours away from a dick pic. This is the day the lord has made rejoice and be glad in it
The struggle bus has heated seats and stops at Dunkin on Friday mornings so I'll be okay.
walk of shamed to graduation. ending college with a bang....
do you think there's enough of the fabric you gave me to make a crop top for a cat?
I'm not in it for just the sex. If I wanted mediocre dick once a week I would have stayed with one of my exes.
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