He just kept muttering to himself "stabby stabby stabby stabby" while we were boning. I will never be boning him again.
No. untill you have done a puke that contains nothing but semen and tequila, you do not 'feel my pain'
I think it's time we have the "weird fetish" talk.
My cock is literally on the edge of falling off. Fuck Vegas.
Dude, I just had the best sex of my life in a porta potty at the NCAA girls lax championships but didn't get her name or number. But I have her sunglasses. How is this possible, I'm sad.
I love your life.
I'm doing laundry from this weekend.. That poor shirt I wore to the rave smells like a dead animal that rolled in weed and pain..
In the pictures there's a flower in my hair and also a lobster, I need those things explained
If I don't go to Australia I'm using that towards a new car. If I do I'll use it to buy a koala.
I hopped in a random dudes car outside the strip club at 3pm on a Sunday and said "Follow that car!"
Wait..I'm drunk and butt naked making a pizza. Happy Wednesday.
Fuck that guy and his dumb haircut and awesome dick
Is it immoral to trade sex for the use of his laundry room?
Is there a reason why your pubic hair is a plastic bag on my bathroom floor? And yes I know its yours... You wrote your name on the bag
Pretty sure I was naked for most of the night.....success
Be careful, there is sex in the air.
Randomize
