come downstairs quick. our boyfriends are having a dance off in nothing but their underwear and shoes. and they have semis too.
i think i would be more confident if i were chinese.
DO IT!!! IT MUST BE FATE THAT I GAVE YOU THAT CONDOM!!!!
Note: footlong is not the password to the subway wi fi network.. p.s- im super high
Too lazy to get out of my bed thats 2 feet away from you. Are you sure youre alright?
No The bastards made me buy a new one, They don't cover water damage an apparently they consider salsa water damage
In other news, I apparently ate my retainers while rolling last night.
Been in bed for 16 hours. Haven't eaten in 18 hours. Haven't pissed in almost 20 hours. Fuck you Stacey and your former reign as laziest bitch. I got the title now.
Whenever I think to myself, "I don't work for a bunch of hours"... It's shot time?
I walked by the two of them and mouthed "fuck me" based on there reaction I think they just came in their pants
You just want to live out all your fuck fantasies with all these girls through me. I know your game. Well played sir.
she doesn't even know what year it is. She just stumbles around life with a bottle of rum
We had sex and then stood naked in his living room eating zucchini bread.
I AM BEING ACCOSTED BY A HUMMING BIRD
I AM IN MILD DISTRESS
so my parents definitely heard me when I was cumming last night...
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