Regardless of the degree, it's probably not good to relate so closely to the Steve-O documentary.
his balls ACTUALLY tasted like nuts
"romantic friends" sounds more classy then friends with benfits
I couldnt decide if i wanted to pee first or vomit. So i Peed sideways while throwing up into the tub.
i just hugged the lady at the liquor store goodbye for the summer...
Just got a birthday card from Camel. How am I supposed to stop smoking when they care?
I don't think he wanted to hear that my most serious relationship was my 1 1/2 year fuck buddy... I think he figured out that's where he's heading
I have blocked the memory from my mind. He is just a fuzzy cloud floating with my other bad decisions..
Either I'm spending too much time drinking or my perfume is starting to smell like a pineapple vodka.
Guess who left Professor Cunt on their paper by accident?
Turns out I was the only one drinking. I broke one guy's bed and kicked another in the face. Then when an RA came by I shouted to let him in he's gonna find the vodka anyway. Great night
well in the interest of full disclosure I have been using a used kfc spork as a buttscratcher for a month
true... I just kept thinking "THAT IS A PENIS. OMG THAT IS A PENIS. DOES HE KNOW IM STARRING? STOP LOOKING. OMG THIS IS AWKWARD. PENISSSSS"
He fell on top of me at a party. I slept with him a week later. We've been fucking for 2 moths. Most successful relationship ever.
no need to worry, I have the internet and a cape, I can accomplish anything. nothing can go wrong, I am unstoppable. Yo.
Randomize
