Solid performance last night. Wanna be fuck buddies?
As it would turn out, "jesusssssss" is not the password to enter Faith Chapel's wifi network.
some guy just pulled a dress out of a fax machine...I have no idea what the hell is going on
He gave me his number and said the usual call whenever you need someone but then was like... or just call me.
You would pick up a guy in AA.
we used a swiffer mop as a stripper pole.
I gurantee you I'll be the only one dressed as a giraffe.
All is not lost. The bondage chair came with repair seals and glue. It's like the knewwwwwww this would happen.
They told you that you couldn't fit in the dryer. Man, did they eat their words. You did brake the door though.
You've created a tinder dominating monster.
I'm like, not good at living.
Dipping my sugar cookies in a glass of fireball and creme soda. This is holiday spirit
I just found a samari sword in the couch. I'm about to take like 5 shots and pretend to be captain jack sparrow
you asked how they got the microwave in the air. we had to explain three times that it was mounted there until you finally feel asleep
I ran into the marine at the grocery store. Its like my vag and his penis have this way of finding each other when I least want it.
I watched one of the videos of you hanging from the rafters, and it is both violent and sexual in nature.
Randomize