yeah bitch needs to recognize there's only one person with this face
How fortunate humanity is that it need not rely on the female orgasm for procreation
If I was there, I'd make you a vicodin spiked sandwich.
My rats are drinking wine. I am drinking with rats. God i am so alone.
I think you blew it when you asked her "Do you look good naked too, Or is it just the bra?"
Okay, lets just agree to keep all cutlery related activities to a minimum.
just threw up what i'm pretty sure look like contents of a lava lamp
I'm not entirely sure what we did is legal in the U.S., but I know that couple wont be the same
Also we saw a clown getting arrested. Rochester is weird.
I was scared that I should know him but I was too busy blacking out to remember
Remember the couple Steve and I heard and rated their sex based on the bed squeaks cuz we couldn't sleep through the noise? We got them back. They turned up the radio to drown us out.
Dude when the cops came you ran through the fence. Fucking THROUGH it. You're a master ditcher.
Also this guy in my contact as hairy jerry sent me a pic of him shirtless and said I miss you and I have no idea who he is /when or if I met him but that's not normal?!
I need to buy fuckboy repellant for whenever I think it's a good idea to meet boys I found in tinder
hey if my parents say thanks for the meatballs just go with it ill explain later
Randomize
