Michelle and I recorded her bunny humping it's little rubber black ball.
I just applied for an unsubsidized loan naked. I love the internet.
so i turned around to do some reverse cowgirl when he said that this was such a better visual for him. Bad compliment or serious insult. i cant tell
at the hospital. he locked himself in the kitchen, said he was making beer batter shrimp. don't know if it's the mercury poisoning, alcohol poisoning or second degree burns they're holding him for, but i've got a pretty guess.
I jerked him off and then punched him in the face for no reason. Typical evening drinking Sailor Jerry's.
we've decided whoever is stupid enough to use the condom that's tacked to the wall deserves to get pregnant.
Yea we had fun. Lost my wallet some girl has it. Sarah fell asleep in a cab and ended up at some wawa. It was cray. She's home now
She needs sedatives and a leash
Steaks?
It's Ash Wednesday.
If you really think that not eating meat on a weeknight is going to keep you out of hell, fine. Can I use that chimichurri you made?
But how do I turn off the feelings though?
Vodka.
She said "I feel like I haven't reached my full potential" and I couldn't figure if she meant in life or with the weed..
is that a dick in a sweater?
i just got carded for condoms. wtf.....this is new. isnt safe sex a good thing?
you said you were going to the bathroom. we found you an hour later laying in the backyard clutching a bottle of vodka while singing the beatles and crying
What is the best medium with which to say, "Happy Birthday, I'm having your abortion"... Cake? Card?
Randomize
